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Weekend Players' Club 1/27/23
StoneColdSpider Jan 28, 2023
G'Day everyone……. Its a sunny Saturday here……. Been a rather quiet week…….. We had Australia Day on the 26th of January…….. I had a BBQ and relaxed most of the day and played some Windjammers……. Besides that it was a rather straight forward week with not much happening……. Just my usual walks and work…….. Ive taken Rufus out for a walk nearly every day this week……. Which has been really good….. I am still waiting for Ride 4 to go on sale…… This week though Ride 2 has been on the week long steam sale……. *sigh*…….

As for gaming this week I played…….

Arcade

Bay Route (1989 Sunsoft) - Run and Gun
Ninja Clowns (1991 Strata) - Beat 'em up
Windjammers (1994 Data East) - Sports (Frisbee)


Console

ESPN NFL 2K5 (2004 Sega) - Sony PlayStation 2 - Sports (Football)
Kirby's Dream Course (1995 Nintendo) - Super Nintendo Entertainment System - Sports (Mini Golf)
Mario Golf: Toadstool Tour (2003 Nintendo) - Nintendo GameCube - Sports (Golf)
Mario Power Tennis (2004 Nintendo) - Nintendo GameCube - Sports (Tennis)
MotoGP 08 (2008 Capcom) - Sony PlayStation 2 - Sports (Racing)
NCAA Football 11 (2010 EA Sports) - Sony PlayStation 2 - Sports (Football)
Tecmo Super Bowl 2023 (2022 TecmoBowl.org) - Nintendo Entertainment System - Sports (Football)
Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles IV: Turtles in Time (1992 Konami) - Super Nintendo Entertainment System - Beat 'em up


NCAA Football 11 Steve Austin Road to Glory



This week the undefeated Boise State Broncos (4-0) are at home against the Toledo Rockets (4-1)

As per usual Austin spent one night studying and four nights training and all his new attribute points were put into agility….. To make his jukes and spin moves even more devastating…...


Lee Corso picking the Boise State Broncos to beat the Toledo Rockets……....

Boise State won the toss and elected the receive the ball first……. Two plays in Steve Austin was in the endzone after a monster run…….

The better juking and spin moves make getting past the defense easy…… With Austin now just needing half a hole to run through……..

Austin kept showing his Heisman potential as he ends the day with 9 rushing touchdowns and 3 receiving touchdowns……. As the Boise State Broncos demolished the Toledo Rockets 91 – 0…….

The defense keep on not giving up points as they also caught 4 interceptions and made 3 fumble recoveries to get the offense excellent field position time and time again…….




Some action shots of Austin running the ball….


Steve Austins rushing stats again the Rockets…….


NCAA Offensive and Defensive Players Of The Week…….


Steve Austin still #1 on the Heisman watch list……


Campus Gazette issue 7…...

Next game Boise State will be traveling to San Jose to take on the San Jose State University Spartans…..


MotoGP 08 Stone Cold Spider Career


Round 4 at Shanghai International Circuit…….

Its time for round 4 of the 2008 125cc World Championship in China……..

Another quick qualifying session and another pole position for myself…… This time it was not raining and the Shanghai Circuit goes much better for me than last week…….. My main championship rival Mike Di Meglio could only manage a set a time that was 7th quickest…… So he will be starting on the 3rd row……. So I have a good chance to extend my championship points lead by quite a bit…...


On the grid waiting for the lights……

Still no rain but those clouds do look very threatening…….. I get an OK start off the line and I am just half a bike length behind going into the first corner……. I managed to hold out around the outside and that gave me the inside after the snail section…….. And I was able to grab the lead from Simone Corsi…….

From then on I only ever lose the lead down the main straight that is super long as the slipstream effect is so great to hold off the other riders……. But I quickly get the lead back at the very hard braking zone at the end of the straight where I can slightly later on the breaks and reclaim the lead…….

Sadly for me though I couldnt do anything to stop Mike Di Meglio from gaining positions during the race and ending in 3rd place behind myself and Simone Corsi……

I extended my points lead in the championship from 19 points to 28 points…...


First page of the race results for round 4……


First page of the Championship standings after round 4…..




Some nice images of the cool down lap………

Next week I am off to the Le Mans Bugatti Circuit in France for Round 5…..


Ninja Clowns


Ninja Clowns……


This is C.Rap…….

Well……. This is it……. This really is it……. This IS the worst arcade game I have EVER played……. This makes C.Rap Boys look like Ninja Baseball Bat Man…… This game is complete C.Rap……..

The controls are awful and unresponsive…… The “Music” makes you wish you were deaf…….. For a game about “Nina Clowns” graphics are so lifeless and dull that CoD and BF took inspiration from Ninja Clowns for their brown grey loads of bloom graphics…… And the game play is so woefully painful its insane…… The hit boxes are complete crap and there is nothing……. NOTHING…….. That makes this game fun to play in anyway shape or form…….

The story line is that someone is kidnapped…… who??? dont know…… why??…… dont know……. But its so serious that the city puts out the “Clown Signal” and then they send in the clowns and we are then introduced to the titular “Ninja Clown” who is not very……... Ningery……… In fact he looks like a dorky wimpy clown….… Even Curry Man looks more intimidating that this so called “Ninja” clown…….

There are plenty of clown weapons to use like extending arm boxing glove….. Pies…… And the always not funny spray bottle and many more unfunny clown weapons……. Only thing missing was the water squirting flower, “comically” over sized hammer (There is a hammer but its not comically oversized)……. And the super not funny hand buzzer…….

The controls are……. One button for punch….. One button for kick and one button for throwing….. You might have noticed a lack of a jump button……. Thats because there is no button for jump…… For you see this game does not resemble anything close to a good beat ‘em up…….. In fact it does not resemble a good game at all…… To jump….. Get this…. Its up on the stick and pressing the kick button……. UP + KICK…….. TO JUMP!!!…….

And if you think thats bad……. This is a “Beat ‘em up” from 1991……. That has NO grabs and therefore no throws…… NO Combo moves……. And has a space-clearing attack sooooo bad that it can be interrupted at ANY POINT during the wind up animation so when Ninja Clown is surrounded and needs to use the space-clearing attack he cant cause hes constantly getting hit……… But the space-clearing attack doesnt drain health so just spam it before you get surrounded…….. Well…… They thought of that……. And the more you use the space-clearing attack the longer and longer and longer the wind up animation takes……. The same wind up that makes Ninja Clown 100% defenseless and open to any attack THAT CANCELS THE SPACE-CLEARING ATTACK……. AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

The enemies are also rather uninspired…… A lot of circus themed “characters” to beat up……. Such as mimes, bearded ladies, midgets, strong men and many other generic circus freaks…… The bosses are just as bad if not worse……. A guy who likes to bowl is the first boss……. And none get better than that……. Theres even a “spider” boss…… and that still sucks……..

Im starting to wish I played Action 52 instead…….

This game is cheap as hell too….. Ninja Clowns life bar is short (Thats what she said)…… Its so short that it can take seconds to drain his health bar…….. Bosses are the worst….. With some bosses able to kill Ninja Clown in two hits……. This thing is a quarter muncher……..

So the controls are awful….. The graphics are awful……. The sounds are awful…… The music is awful…….. The gameplay is awful……. The enemies are awful…….. Is there anything positive to say about this game????……. Well…….. The game is short……. BUT……. Still outstays its welcome faster than Binky the Clown…… It only takes about 35 minutes to beat the game……… BUT…….. It honestly felt like I was playing it for hours…….

There actually is one thing…. The ONLY thing…….. Ninja Clown is good at…….. And thats making children cry……... As it steals their quarters…..

This game is not only certified C for C.Rap Boys its surpass C.Rap Boys in C.Rappyness

If you have family or friends who ever say “Hey lets play this great game I know called “Ninja Clowns”…… Disown them immediately and/or remove them from your circle of friends and never ever have contact with them again…… They are crazy and should be locked up in a mental institution…….

MINUS FIVE STARS!!!!!!
DO NOT PLAY!!!!


As of this moment I now have a new rating for the most awful games I play…….. Now games that are truly worthy of the title shall now be Certified CC for C.Rap Clowns……..


Even the “Spider” boss is C.Rap……

Next week I dont know what is going on……. I need time to recover from Ninja Clowns……. The weather also looks to be a bit weird with some days being rain and others being sunny……. So who knows……. I cant believe its almost the end of January already….. Its insane……

As for gaming there will be the usual NCAA Football 11 and MotoGP 08……. There will be another TMNT game as well…… and most probably another Kirby game…… And I hope to not play anything as bad a Ninja Clowns…….. Or I might end up in a mental institution…….

Well thats it from me…… Have a good week everyone……

Now for my bad joke of the week……
Its such a shame nothing is built in Australia anymore……. I just bought a TV and it said “Built in Antenna”……….. I dont even know where that is……..
*ba dum.... tssssh…...*

Last edited by StoneColdSpider on 28 January 2023 at 2:11 am UTC
Pengling Jan 28, 2023
I had a tough time deciding what to play this weekend, but eventually ended up with a bit of a "Six Degrees of Bomberman" theme in the end;


My first game this weekend is Hudson Soft's NES version of Lode Runner - the game without which Bomberman as we know him today would not exist. Released for the Famicom in 1984, it features 50 stages, and cute graphics that were heavily overhauled from the original Apple II stick-figures so as to better fit the tastes of the Famicom market. The game was a massive hit, and the sprites for the Guard robots were edited a bit and re-used for the robotic protagonist of the Famicom version of Bomberman the following year - a game which, at the time, was tied in with this version of Lode Runner.


The second pick isn't one that most would know is connected to the first - it's Sega's Master System version of the helicopter-rescue classic, Choplifter. This version is a little more arcade-like than those that came before it (in fact, it's based on Sega's arcade conversion of the original Apple II game), as it's a little bit less stringent about how many hostages need to be rescued in each stage. There's an excellent video-retrospective on this version that was recently released by video game historian Jeremy Parish, here.

The connecting thread between these two games is the Bungeling Empire - Brøderbund Software's catch-all villainous organisation, which was referenced in several games that they published and which typically used robots to do their dirty-work. Reportedly this was due to concerns about video game violence towards humans from some people at the company, but I've not yet found anything to back up this possibly-anecdotal claim that occasionally floats around.

The Bungelings are who you're retrieving stolen gold from in Lode Runner, and they were behind the kidnappings of the hostages that you're tasked with rescuing in Choplifter. They're also the empire that Bomberman escaped from after apparently being created in one of their underground compounds, according to the first Famicom Bomberman title.

The fact that a rather eclectic list of older games is connected to the Bomberman series amuses and interests me, and I'm interested in seeing how far those connections spread out - Bomberman might just be a Kevin Bacon of gaming!


Beyond that, the latest score in my daft quest to reach the ending sequence of Alien Crush is 148,299,700 of 999,999,990.

Quoting: StoneColdSpiderIm starting to wish I played Action 52 instead…….
And now.... The Cheetahmen.

Last edited by Pengling on 28 January 2023 at 4:41 am UTC
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